I have been feeling an encompassing sense of 'completeness' in my life. The body of work that has been downloading and uploading (heaven and earth) into me, and that I have been sourcing for 10 years, that guided me step by step in all areas of my life was complete. It would pour into me, day and night. An ever present call that I would respond to, opening to the next and the next and the next... Until one day I woke up... and there was nothing. It was complete. I experienced not stillness but a sense of 'emptiness'. As if my purpose was complete. That which I had agreed to do somewhere somewhen beyond this human lifetime had come to a close.
There was nothing else to do but stand in that space of unknowingness, that empty space without dreams and desires and simply breath. And wait. And as the days became weeks a still voice whispered: reach out, connect, share this moment in time. So I did. I wrote to Soleira Green whom I consider to be my cosmic fairy god mother, knowing, feeling, sensing that by speaking and writing the words, and being met in this space, something would be possible that had not been thus far. That I might find my way into something for which I as yet had no words, sensing just the slightest frisson of a nameless possibility.
Saturday, the 10th of November. I felt deeply called to a sound bath- which in and of itself was unusual as I am not often drawn to such things. But this time I simply knew that I had to be there. The event was held in a beautiful old church in downtown L.A. and the space, lit by candles and purple light was gorgeous. The moment the event began and sound wrapped itself around me, I was 'gone'. My human self slept whilst my consciousness traveled on a sound beam. I went 'home'. A place where I was deeply nourished, a place where I could dream a new dream for my life.
90 minutes later as the sound bath ended, I returned to my body, knowing that I had been very intentional in my dreaming, very precise with my requests. I had brought a new template through, a new creation, a new chapter for my life.
The next day, the cosmic 'goo' available, the creational possibilities, the frequencies of exquisite, were extraordinary, unlike anything that I had access to or experienced before. I know many felt this on 11-11 and I am so grateful that that I am part of a collective consciousness that sources at this level, that knows itself as a creational force on this level.
The frequencies and particular configuration of possibilities that we opened to on 11-11 are still subtle, still weaving themselves into the collective consciousness step by step but it is there for those who desire it. 11-11 invited us all to take a next step in consciousness which in turn will allow events to unfold that will bring us that much closer to living in a world of beauty- for all.
The day of the dead celebrations.
My first time.
Doorways and portals and dimensions opening to my understanding of life and death and self and other.
Of not the cycle of life and death but the communion between the two.
Life and death create each other, support each other, define each other. A constant communion of a continuum.
As I was walking in the Hollywood Forever cemetery where the celebrations were being held, gazing upon the alters and offerings in awe, I asked the energy, space, consciousness of the day of the dead to contribute to me that which it desired. I longed to dance with it.
I felt the energy moving, slowly at first and then consuming and embracing the space that I am. I felt the consciousness of it move deep into my heart and I opened. Reverence. Awe. The continuum. The constant communion between life and death.
The next day, I felt so incredibly vibrant and alive. The day of the dead had gifted me the vibrancy and aliveness of life. We human beings live at the cusp of a paradox. We are embodiments and manifestations of a dream of dizzying proportions.
I have also found that every person who has been abused or violated in some way holds 'death' energy at the back of their hearts. If that is not opened to and received it will manifest in one's life at some point. Be it in health, relationship or a continuous sense of limitation and contraction that stops the grace filled flow that life can be. Death holds an invitation to us to LIVE, heart wide open.
May we all receive it on this day where life and death are so tangibly communing, saturating the air around us with an invitation to celebrate it All.