There is a softness in the air. As I watch the flowers blossom, tender buds opening to the sky, hear the sweetness of birdsong outside of my window, the gentleness that is spring carressing my skin, I feel the resonance within. It is time.
I have walked that inner labyrinth of the soul into the very depths of the void, the darkness within. I have danced with the shadows, my feet finding their way between skulls and bones and broken landscapes of despair. I have endlessly heard the beat of the drum and sat with the elders around the fire, until that rhythm coalesced with mine and I remembered. The knowing arising from my body and being, my spirit and soul in hallowed communion.
And now, as I sit quietly within that space of power, comfortable in the alchemy of intensity, a different invitation awaits. I know it’s time. My bones have been engraved with the gifts that I am to share. The sunlight awaits.
As I step out, I hesistate. The song is sweet. And unknown. My eyes need time to adjust to the light. I exhale, my body begins to move of its own volition, my arms opening wide to give space to my heart.
I return. To the light.
February was one of those months where the invitation to surrender to Life could not be denied. To the rhythm of it, the tone, the harmony, the lyrics. Every aspect orchestrated by a Magical Mystery so much larger than the ‘self’ that I experience myself to be.
There were workshops every week-end that transformed me from the inside out, dance performances that left their imprint for days on my body memory, weaving a magic all of its own as my body calibrated to yet another expansive possibility, concerts and wordly delights of every kind. Feburary was Full.
And the Becoming that was invited into occurred in the moments between. In the pause where I rested. Where I let go, cuddling into the sofa, exclaiming with a big smile ‘that was so nice’. Unable to move much, sleeping for hours upon hours as the experience was received into the very depths of me, to alchemise first the essence of my Being, and then the pathways to cognition. My dance with life altering as I morphed, again and again and again. Lying still, on that sofa. Explaining to those who care for me and who expressed concern at my fatigue: ‘It’s as if I’m becoming a different creature. All my energy is focused inwards so that I can shapeshift into something else’. And in that shapeshifting lay the hidden treasures so longed for.
‘Resonance’ is something that has long defined my experience of life. What I could partake of, what I could receive. What I could jell with, dance with, party and celebrate Life with. If it didn’t resonate with the essence of Who I Am, it hurt to allow it within my world, thereby curtailing in many ways the expression of life that could be reveled in. As I surrendered into that space between, that pause between worlds, I received the alchemical elixer that allowed me to learn how to turn copper into unicorns. My world opened up.
In the years of my ever present becoming, the greatest magic has occurred in the pause. In that space where I allow myself to do ‘nothing’. To Be. Still. Allow. Breathe. Surrender. Dissolve. To be ever remade into Magic.